More on Love and Relationships
Quotations For In and
Out of Love
Hopeful,
Happy, & Falling in Love
Getting To Know You/Getting Along
The Roller
Coaster of Love
Commitment &
Marriage
Heartbreak, Hurt & Breaking Up
Getting Back
Together
Happy Being Single
Moving On
Funny Ha Ha & Ah Ha
Let's Not
Forget About Sex...
...And Then
There's Kids
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Hopeful,
Happy, & Falling in Love |
"And we'll
fill in the missing colors in each other's paint-by-number dreams."
-Jackson Brown, Lyrics from "The Pretender"
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"Love is a canvas, furnished by Nature and embroidered by imagination."
-Voltaire
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"Love is a friendship set on fire."
-Unknown
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"When you are in love you can't
fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams."
-Dr. Seuss
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"The definition of a good
relationship is if you like who you are when you are with that other
person."
-Ché Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"He who is not impatient is not in
love."
-Italian proverb
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"Love is a condition in which the
happiness of another person is essential to your own."
-Robert Heinlein, American Science Fiction Writer
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"Love is friendship set to
music."
-E. Joseph Cossman
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"To be in love is merely to be in
a perpetual state of anesthesia."
-H. L. Mencken, American editor, author, critic, humorist
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"Love makes your soul crawl
out from it's hiding place."
-Zora Neale Hurston
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Getting To Know You/Getting
Along |
"Laughter is the shortest
distance between two people."
-Victor Borge
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The Roller Coaster of Love |
"Maybe God put a few bad
people in your life, so when the right one came along you'd be
thankful."
-Andrea Kiefer
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"The Beatles sang, 'All You
Need Is Love.' They forgot to mention that it might be easier on LSD."
-Che' Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"If you judge people, you have no
time to love them."
-Mother Teresa
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"Love makes time pass; time makes
love pass."
-French proverb
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"Love is a state in which man sees
things most decidedly as they are not."
-Friedrich Nietzsche, German philosopher
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"Love is a gross exaggeration of
the difference between one person and everybody else."
-George Bernard Shaw
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"Falling in love is hard on the
knees."
-Aerosmith
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"We that are true lovers run into
strange capers."
-William Shakespeare
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"Do not bite the bait of
pleasure till you know there is no hook in it."
-Thomas Jefferson
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"The true man wants two
things: danger and play. For that reason he wants woman as the most
dangerous plaything."
-Friedrich Nietzsche, Philosopher
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Commitment & Marriage |
"Forever
is a long time to wear the wrong ring."
-Terrance Howard, Academy
Award nominated actor
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"Men don't feel the urge to get married as quickly as women do,
because their clothes all zip and button in the front."
-Rita Rudner, Comedian
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"What's the point of
bigamy and polygamy? Just because you have sperm, doesn't mean you have
to use them all."
-Che' Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"My mother buried three
husbands...and two were only napping."
-Rita Rudner, Comedian
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"Love is blind--marriage is the
eye-opener."
-Pauline Tomason
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"Marriage is a fine
institution, but I'm not ready for an institution."
-Mae West, Actress & Comedian
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"I love being married. It's
so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest
of your life."
-Rita Rudner, Comedian
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Heartbreak,
Hurt & Breaking Up |
"Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell."
-Unknown
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"Who do you turn to when the only person in the world that can stop you
from crying, is exactly the one making you cry?"
-Unknown
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"Two things I cannot fix: The
crack of dawn and a broken heart."
-Dennis Miller, Comedian
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"Falling in love is awfully
simple. Falling out of love is simply awful."
-Unknown
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"The hottest love has the coldest
end."
-Socrates, Greek philosopher
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"She's the kind of girl who
climbed the ladder of success...wrong by wrong."
-Mae West, Actress & Comedian
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Getting Back Together |
"Getting back with your old boyfriend is like having a garage sale
and buying your old stuff back."
-Laura Knightlinger
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"Remarrying a husband you've
divorced is like having your appendix put back in."
-Phyllis Diller, Comedian
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Happy Being Single |
"Silly is the new sexy."
-Che' Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"Forget love...I'd rather fall in
chocolate."
-Unknown
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"I used to be Snow
White...but I drifted."
-Mae West, Actress & Comedian
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Moving On
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"Alright, hands up:
Who all has “Another One Bites The Dust” as their romantic theme
song?"
-Ché Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"The
nice thing about laughter? It inappropriately fits in at sad times and
lightens your spirits."
-Ché Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"Don't cry because it's over.
Smile because it happened."
-Dr. Seuss
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"The more I think about it, the
more I realize there is nothing more artistic than to love others."
-Vincent Van Gogh, Dutch painter
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"Wife left with best friend. Need money for thank you
note."
-Denver Panhandler's sign
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Funny Ha Ha & Ah Ha |
"So if we make our own bed, and
have to lie in it, why can't we just get new sheets?!"
-Ché Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"What the world needs is more love and less paperwork."
-Pearl Bailey
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"Love is such a big
word, it really should have more letters."
-Kobi Yamada
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Lets Not Forget About Sex... |
"Sex after 90 is like trying to play pool with a rope."
-George Burns, Comedian
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"There's a line of restaurants called "BJ's" and they are in
expansion mode. Perhaps they should strategically locate them. Like next
to Hooters."
-Ché Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"A hard man is good to find."
-Mae West, Actress & Comedian
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"I love to tell someone their pants are ringing."
-Ché Rippinger, Relationship Humorist
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"The sound of a kiss is not so
loud as that of a cannon, but its echo lasts a great deal longer."
-Oliver Wendell Holmes
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"Good sex is like good
Bridge...If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand."
-Mae West, Actress & Comedian
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"Men hate to lose. I once
beat my husband at tennis. I asked him, 'Are we going to have sex
again.' He said, 'Yes, but not with each other."
-Rita Rudner, Comedian
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"Women might be able to fake
orgasms, but men can fake whole relationships."
-Sharon Stone, Actress
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...And Then There's Kids |
"A 2-year-old is like having a blender but you don't have a
top for it."
-Jerry Seinfeld, Comedian
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"They're trying to put warning
labels on liquor saying, 'Caution, alcohol can be dangerous to pregnant
women.' That's ironic. If it weren't for alcohol, most women wouldn't
even be that way."
-Rita Rudner, Comedian
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"We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we
bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet."
-Rita Rudner, Comedian
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